August 23, 2010
Every now and then someone sends me some church humor. This one can be found online and includes more examples, sure to ruffle the feathers of almost every person out there. I just picked out a few of my favorites and included my own church in this mix, which is nondenominational.
How many Charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?
Five. One to change the bulb and four to bind the spirit of darkness in the room.
How many TV evangelists does it take …?
One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
How many independent Baptists does it take …?
Only one because any more would be compromise and the standards of light would surely slip.
How many liberals does it take …?
At least 10, as they need to hold a debate on whether or not the light bulb exists. Even if they can agree upon the existence of the light bulb, they still may not change it to keep from alienating those who might use other forms of light.
How many Southern Baptists does it take …?
CHANGE?? – Or – At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.
How many United Methodists does it take …?
We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey, you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship to your light bulb and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
How many Non-denominationals does it take … ?
Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved — you can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.
The truth is, change is sometimes difficult but always a necessary part of life. Many times, change is a joyful celebration. Cindy and I welcomed a new grandson in the last month, Seth Hudson Fox. He is undergoing a lot of change right now, mostly with his diapers, but God has set him on a path, I believe, to help change his generation. Seth means “appointed” and Hudson Taylor was the founder of the China Inland Mission, which at his death included 205 mission stations with over 800 missionaries, and 125,000 Chinese Christians. Sounds to me like my second grandson will be sent by God to the nations. I hope I get to live long enough to see it.
My fourth child and third son, Luke, is also going through a change this week. Luke is leaving to attend Bryan College in Tennessee, and he shared with the church last Sunday that he is feeling a mixture of excitement, fear, and gratitude. He is excited about this next season of preparation. He is fearful about the new challenges in the classroom, living with two roommates, and being away from home for the first time. He is grateful for the foundation in Christ he has received from his family and his church.
Here’s the final word on change: Because God doesn’t, we don’t have to fear it.
“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” That is great news.
J. Mark Fox 